Pictures...

As life returns to normal... and the temperatures drop (hopefully... soon), I'm excited for the coming months of vacation. We'll go from cool to cold to freezing in a matter of 18 days. Anyway, here is a few pictures of when husband came home.
They came in the door that all the purple heart vets are facing. The lights went out though, and the "DJ" blew smoke from his little smoke generator thing... so, pictures were pointless.

This is Lois, our Lieutenant Colonel's wife, and our welcome home banner for 1st Brigade.

And, of course, us... I look a little crazy, crazy in LOVE!!

Thanks for all the "welcome home" messages from you guys. It's amazing to me that people I don't even know have interest in my life. Thanks so much.
Have a nice day! We are off to watch football at our local sports pub... and that is how you know life is back to normal!

recollection

Ahh yes, I remember this...
I remember the feel of his steaming breath on my neck at night. I remember how incompatible we are with our sleeping arrangements. I remember how he scoots closer and closer to me at night with his head on my chest, and I inch closer to the edge of the bed.
I remember.
I remember how it used to feel like a three ton elephant shared the bed. When he breathed in, I'd prepare myself for a "morning breath" of humid air on my chest... like Chinese water torture. I remember how eventually, I would wiggle him onto his back so that I could get some rest.
He remembers too. See... this is nonnegotiable in his book. He needs to be next to (on top of) me at night, and I need my space.
So, as I drift to sleep, I stroke his hair in remembrance of this pesky little thing called love.
I kiss his forehead,
and,
I
give
in.

pictures! don't get excited... it's just my yard.

Well, my house is clean, the yard is clean and decorated, Zora got a bath, the cat box got cleaned, the fridge is stocked, the sheets are washed, the lawn is mowed, the car is vacummed and full of gas... is there anything else? Oh yea, I better get in the shower and start the grooming ritual!! For by this time tomorrow, my hubby and I will be watching the sun set on our year apart... Our lives becomes "Our Life."

Here are a few pictures of what Matt will see when he gets home. I'll take some of the welcome home ceremony, and post them when I come up for air. ;)

Here's what Matt will see when we round the block towards our house... see Zora in the yard... she will have a t-shirt on. I'll post pics of that another time.


Here's what he will see when we turn the corner...


and what's in his face when we enter the driveway...


Here is what our Service Star Flag looked like on the day I put it up...


and one year later when I will take it down...


Well, that's all I've got for now. Stay tuned!

Tagged by Trish

And for my short break of busy busy today... here is a lot of the same, some of the new... ENJOY! i'm off to do cup art... which will later be blogged. Stay tuned.

1. What is your current age - 26

2. When is your birthday - October 13

3. Nationality - melting pot American

4. Do you have any pets - 2- Tigalilly- kitty 5 years; Zora- puppy almost 2 years

5. Sexuality - straight? is that what this is asking?

6. What colour is your hair- dark brown with a hint of red

7. What colour are your eyes- brown... Matt calls them "pretty doe eyes". I think that means I look like a dear.

8. What ethnicity are you - Irish and German with a hint of Mexican

9. Favourite music - country mostly

10. Favourite films - ummm... Amerie is my favorite of all time, thus far.

11. Dating Status - happily married, and soon to be happily together!

12. Favourite book - I'm a big fan of VC Andrews (or at least I used to be) and Chronicles of Narnia

13. Favourite tv show -Smallville, Heroes, New Adventures of Old Christine, Grey's Anatomy, Without a Trace

14. Dream man - Matty

15. Dream woman - ummm... me

16. Can you speak any other languages - sign language, and some spanish

17.I was tagged by Trish. I am tagging fancythis, and twinki.

Priceless Picture

I received the official call that Matthew is on a plane bound for me!
A Picture Worth 1000 Million Words.
We truly take a lot for granted. Forget the football "heroes" and movie "stars". Pass this on so that all may know the price of freedom.
Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you,
Jesus Christ and the American Soldier
One died for your soul;
the other for your freedom.

How can you NOT PASS this along, we all send dozens of jokes.

obviously

Google:

insomnia kills

I pop up... yes, and it's 1:42am.

Naturally.

waiting to hear the best words, and waiting to breathe

I had a dream... I had a dream about my wonderful husband... It was lovely. I won't go into the details; you don't want to imagine them. I woke, and I swear, just as the sky is blue, I heard Matthew say, "Hey Hon?"

Two words that didn't carry very much weight.

"Hey Hon?" As if he were looking for his brown socks, phone charger, or shoe polish.

Words that have more of a hidden meaning than "I love you." Words that let you know... all is normal, or, as it should be, at least.

"Hey Hon..." as he begins a sentence that ends with his adoration of my "pretty little doe eyes."

Oh how I've missed the every day of love life... the every day ordinary...

"Hey Hon... do I have any clean shorts?"

When he says "hey hon," I can feel, with the breath he takes before speaking, how much he loves me. And, I am thankful.

"Hey Hon..." And we've picked up... like we never "left off".

"Hey Hon? Want some popcorn?" "...let me get you some coffee." "...what's my mom's telephone number?" "...does the car have gas?" "...want to go to a movie?" "...I love you."

Two words that didn't used to carry much weight... words I'd pay to hear.

"Hey Honey... I'm home."

EDIT:

I am so close... I am so close to all of the previous joys I have missed dearly. I am so close that sometimes, I almost breathe deep, and sigh out my worries. Then, I go to Today In Iraq, a frequent read, and the fear comes, and the tears come. The tears come because, I don't know where he is...? I have no idea... he could be in Baghdad, Ballad, Kuwait, or... he could be flying over the ocean, sleeping soundly and safely... on his way home. But, I can't lose sight... I can't lose sight of what is truly at stake... I must not... I waste not.

What I feel right now... is the worst feeling. It's as if my veins might explode... this feeling comes within a singular moment. Sometimes it happens everyday... sometimes it's only every three days... sometimes it's on the hour... it's completely fucking random. It's that moment when a person imagines the worst. And, I can't stop it. Only seeing his signature "I'm in uniform" walk off that bus and into my arms... will quiet the beast that beats just beneath my skin, and behind my eyes, enveloping my heart.

I am an American.

If you can read this, thank your teacher.If you can read this in English and speak freely about it, thank a veteran!!!! Today, Please remember those who have made the sacrifice for you.

A Million Tears

When the beast that is insomnia beats me to a pulp of barely recognizable matted hair, I find myself sifting through the Internet. Into the wee hours of the night my eyes, open or closed, inhale enormous amounts of information. On occasion, I come across content that doesn't resemble poo.

But that is not the point... as I do this, I set Windows Media Player to random. It's actually a great thing because I have something short of 4,000 music files on my computer, and only a 1GB memory card for my MP3 player... so, it's quite logical to say I don't hear most of this music often. So, I'm reminded of oldies... not really old music, but music that doesn't fit into my workouts, so it's not on my player. I came across this song...

I remember how I cried to it when hubby first left for Iraq. Her different style and voice are both interesting and different... refreshing even. I don't like her "Pretty Enough", but there are many of her songs I enjoy...

Without further delay... I wait to sleep.

A Million Tears- Kasey Chambers

take my hand
break my stride
make me smile
for every time I've cried

hold my heart
in the palm of your hand
don't listen to it breakin'
just listen to the band

do you wanna ride in my car
it's parked out on the street
or just stay with me a while
before I fall asleep

take these tears
wash your skin
I'm havin' trouble breathin'
since you walked in

my hands are tied
my head is reelin'
my eyes have cried
a million tears
from wishin' you were here

all my life
I've welcomed pain
I've made up more excuses
to bring it back again

now I'm here
and I'll drink to the shame
I'll drink to the madness
that made me this way

my hands are tied
my head is reelin'
my eyes have cried
a million tears
from wishin' you were here

take these tears
wash your skin
I'm havin' trouble breathin'
since you walked in...

"We preserve democracy; we don't practice it."

I just caught a welcome home ceremony on TV from Fort Carson. It's nice to see what I'm in for, and also, it's a sad wake up call. All the news can talk about is how 4ID Soldier's have been told to be ready to return to Iraq next Fall. I've tried so hard not to focus on this fact...

The Army... We are not part of regular society... we can vote... but have little say in what happens with our life. I'm so scared, and a bit excited, to see what changes will be made in the Secretary of Defense sector, as well as Congress.

Will they be beneficial? Or, detrimental. I don't know. We'll see...we will see. At the end of the broadcast, the reporter quotes an old saying, "We preserve democracy; we don't practice it."

Sad, but true.

I just want him home.

11million bottles of ACETAMINOPHEN recalled

A recall of a common pain reliver, acetaminophen, has been enacted by the distributors Perrigo. I have a bottle of "Equate, pain reliever", from them... Although my bottle is not listed under the batch numbers being recalled, Walmart is listed as one of the distributors affected. You might want to check out this story.

http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/D/DRUG_WARNING?SITE=7219&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT&CTIME=2006-11-09-09-21-14

November? Seriously?

I can't believe this is near its end.

I've told myself, "You will not cry."

This is like telling your kid not to ask for toys when you go to Walmart... or getting through an entire talk show without a crack made at the President, or a rambling about how Brit and K Fed's split was so "unexpected".

Who am I kidding? I cry during Summer's Eve commercials when (fake) mother and daughter have a heart-warming discussion about their "freshness". I cried when Bobby on The Biggest Loser reunited with his family tonight!

The flood waters are coming... I just hope they don't last too long... I just hope Matt will get to the front of the line, rather than the back like last time... I just hope "reintegration" is as easy as can be... I just hope he doesn't have to go again... I just hope he gets home okay... I guess... I can only "just hope" for one thing.

I'm fucked...

haha... really fucked. Oh justice... how sweet you feel.

Nighty night.

TV sucks on Tuesdays

Tagging Trish, and fancythis. That's all... I don't have many friends. :(

1. Things that scare me: I'm frightened of this so immensely, I can't type them.

2. People who make me laugh: Matthew :)

3.Things I hate the most: I hate that I love peanut butter so unnaturally.

4. Things I don't understand: how people can complain about one thing, and then turn around and do that very same thing???

5.Things I'm doing right now: blogging... duh. That's it... I just got through working on Matt's Welcome Home banner.

6.Things I want to do before I die: I'd like to meet my gret grandkids... have a honeymoon. The later is less likely.

7.Things I can do: I can read.... oh oh oh AND write. I'm so cool.

8. Ways to describe my personality: Ummm.... I don't know... I guess most people find me charming, but when I'm alone in the dark, it overcomes me sometimes.

9. Things I can't do: I can't not care.

10.Things I think you should listen to: Rogue Wave... they are pretty good. And, your mom when she says, "One day, you'll miss me." It's true.

11. Things you should never listen to: ME. :) But, you should read me. :)

12.Things I'd like to learn: I'd like to learn how to use my darn sewing machine.

13.Favorite Foods: Peanut butter. Were you not paying attention?

14.Beverages I drink regularly: water, coffee, chi tea.

14a. Beverages I'm trying not to drink regularly: well, I stopped drinking soda a long time ago. I had to try to do that.

15. Shows I watched as a kid: X-Men, Spiderman, Punky Bruster, Gargoyles, others.

16. Persons I am tagging: Trish, fancythis

short and sweet

Those of you that know me, know I have a huge obsession with everything SUPERMAN... or SUPERGIRL (I prefer "woman", but whatever). Supergirl underwear (let me check... yup, wearing some now), Supergirl PJ shorts, Superman tees, refrigerator magnets, notepads (thanks Trish), air freshers in the shape of the Superman and Supergirl emblem... the house of El... okkkkaaayyy... Anyway, the point is, I love Superman. Smallville.... greatest! I love Tom Welling... oh man. But, I have a serious crush on Michael Rosenbaum, Mr. Lex Luthor himself. So, most would see this, and think maybe it's an isolated incident. Maybe she's not a science fiction fan... just a fluke!? Nope... Chronicles of Narnia... what great books (and movie... even though they started on the SECOND book). I love vampire movies, the X-men, Batman, and the like. Anyway, what's my point? Well, I've discovered (well, I didn't discover it), a new show called Heroes. It's sooooo good. If you haven't seen it, and even if this sort of super hero theme isn't your bag, you should watch it. It's so good. Now, in my search for a Heroes site, I came across a MySpace fansite for the show, and thus discovered Rogue Wave. The song below is on my MySpace site. (note: the name of my MySpace is "supermcgraws"... okay?) Below are the lyrics to said song, called "Eyes". Short and sweet. Check them out; they have some other great songs on their page.


Rogue Wave- Eyes

missed the last train
home birds pass by
to tell me that im not alone
well im pushing myself
to finish this part
i can handle a lot
but one thing i'm missing
is in your eyes

(chorus)
in your eyes
in your eyes
in your eyes

have you seen this film
it reminds me of walking
down the avenue
well im washing my hands
of attachments,
yeah i will land on the ground
but one thing i’m missing
is in your eyes

(chorus)

PS My husband also shares this obsession over Superman with me... which is why we were made for one another... See picture. :) That artist drew our bodies so realistically................

Google, are you trying to tell me something?

Google directed someone to my page that searched (when they were obviously upset):

shitty friends

Google, have I pissed you off? Or, is God trying to tell me something, and using you as an avenue?

Pardon Me

Well, surprisingly, the last week has flown by quickly. I can only hope the week to follow... will run past with the same intensity. I've been busy. Busy trying to finish all the projects I started last year. They are as follows:

1- A massive scrapbook chronicling the year Matt has been away... vacations, birthdays, holidays, and sadly, one death. It's called, "While You Were Away". I can't take credit for the title. It was Jayel, my sister's, idea. It's seriously large. I only have a few pages to finish. I still need those Halloween pictures from Jayel of her boys, Aidan and Bobby. Then, I just have the homecoming pictures to include. He doesn't know about it yet, and I hope he likes it.

2- Another scrapbook that covers those 15 magical days in July and August while Matt was home on R&R. Here is the last page:

What do you think? it's actually my favorite part of the projects because it didn't take very long, and it's all pictures of me, Matthew, and family. We had a ton of fun those 15 days.

3- A book that contains every email (minus the angry ones) Matt wrote me the last year. That one is sort of vanilla, but it's cool too. I'll have to print out every email I wrote him (minus the duplicates), and make a book... but, that is another huge project. He has saved them all, but that is going to take some time. He also has all the cards I've sent him... and others have sent... oh wow, now I'm just piling work on.

4- A welcome home banner. I have a sheet washed, and just waiting to be painted. That is this weeks task.

I still have to make sure the house and car are clean, the yard looks good, give Zora a bath, plan meals, grocery shop, and make arrangements to sleep on my side of the bed again. Oh bother! I better get back to work, eh?

Have a lovely Tuesday!

I love my SIGO

...that is all...

my eyes are bleeding

Red, hot, fierce tears.